Twelve

This Time Last Month....

2012-01-25T23:35:00.003Z

Christmas Day 2011 - Polzeath Beach Cornwall - Us & Brightside

Forty @ Twelve

2011-12-07T23:49:00.000Z

This weekend I turned 40.

Yep, that's me, captured by a very clever friend. Looking like the love child of Miss Piggy & Kermit in my green mac (a patients relative once told me I looked like Shrek too....)

Friend's have turned 40 before me, there have been parties, limo's and wild tales to be told.

However I opted for a quieter weekend, after the past few months I had a strong sense that I wanted to 'keep it real'. To be with those I know the best, love the most. Who know me the most.

Small children were beyond excited.

Mum & Dad (feeling old!).

Conversation's with my brothers.

Messages from my sister, thousands of miles away.

A meal in my most favourite grown up village pub.

I gathered together my closest friend's, those who have known me forever, who have grown through adulthood with me. There was a girlie night out at the local Chinese, plenty of coffee, tea and nattering. Plenty of laughing & reflecting.

Delicious gifts from friend's old & new....(thank you Lisa x)

Some people dread their 40th Birthday, some say its the new 30...

I hope not. I'm embracing it all the way.

The years of being 30+, babies, feeding, toddlers & tantrums. Lack of sleep, feeling so very tired. Old challenges now behind me. Life is a huge journey, and I'm excited to be looking at life in a refreshed way. These will be the years my children will be nurtured into adulthood. My G & me, keeping hold of what brought us together in the first place, not losing sight of each other. New challenges to face. Plans being made, adventures to be had, memories to make & capture.

It's all good.

Back to Life, Back to Reality

2011-12-02T00:40:00.000Z

I dropped the ball labelled blogging - just for a while, just till I got used to juggling the balls that are part of being a mummy, wife, homemaker and nurse again.

After a 3 month break from work, I'm back. Nearly a stone lighter, rested & blood sugars nicely controlled, I feel the best I have done for years. The overwhelming feeling of exhaustion has gone. Its been a funny few months, but I consider I am lucky, its been a wake up call to look after myself, not just those around me.

And its good to be back at work. I have a job I love, its stressful but rewarding beyond measure, I get as much as I give, and feel privileged to be a small part of peoples lives at a difficult time.

I felt rudderless without work, I am so used to having a pattern, a rhythm to my days. I now realise that a big part of me is defined by my job, I've nursed now, for longer than I haven't. I missed my colleagues, the social chit chat & humour (we have that by the bucket load) & my patients, their families.

One of the blessings of my time off, has been looking at my work home life balance. I am fortunate to work within a very supportive team, and am now working my 4 days over 5. This means that in January I will be collecting the smalls from school each & every day. No more after school club pick ups at 5.30pm, & the pressure to get through tea, homework, baths & brownies/scouts before the 8pm bedtime.

Now I will be able to balance doing a job I love, with having good quality time with the people who mean the most to me in my life. How good is that?!

October & November have also been deliciously busy months - We've celebrated the changing seasons

My beautiful girl turned 8 - Celebrating with a vintage tea party & decorating cup cakes....

And my amazing boy, well he is now a still Lego obsessed 11.

And as life settles back down, and Christmas approaches, I am looking forward - looking at shaping Twelve into the home we want to be in, looking into making life simple & good. Looking forward to balance.

Do you want to join me? I so hope so!

Lx

Sugar & Spice - All things nice.....

2011-10-04T13:14:00.001+01:00

There's been a whole lot of baking & mess creating here at Twelve over the past 2 weeks.

From a Smurf Toadstool for my best friend's 5 year old....

To a mahoosive 72 cupcakes.

A 'Worlds Biggest Coffee Morning' for a very good charity was being held where G has his office, & my boss also retired last week (nothing to do with me!)...

::Lemon Meringue::

::Raspberry Pavlova::

::Lime::

::Chocolate Orange::

Yum! & surely there's 1of your 5 a day in each those fruit themed cupcakes....

I still find baking very enjoyable, even if the pleasure is not in the eating anymore.... And for my efforts, G brought home an apron he won at the coffee morning - Thanks babe!

The 10 year old also had his school trip to Kelham Island in Sheffield last week. There were requests for 1940's style clothing and strict instructions on a WW2 pack up for lunch. Thank goodness for Grandads gardening flat cap & Uncle T's wooly socks....

Now my boy is growing, he has hollow legs when it comes to food. So I kinda knew that even with a thick white bread & jam sandwich, and the biggest English apple I could find, it would not keep him going till tea time. So after an internet search on baking WW2 recipes, we decided to have a go at grated carrot (& my finger) biscuits. They were surprisingly passable, and even his friend's ate them - or they may have just been hungry too....

So lunch was all tied up in paper & string, and packed into a paper bag.

Ahhhh, look at him racing into the car - eager to go on his trip... No way had he just told me to 'give over mum with the camera'. No, he never would, not after all the effort I'd put in...

Hmpff!

:: It was good in Cornwall :: Part Two

2011-09-18T00:20:00.000+01:00

Our last day & one of the best. Last days are always a mixed bag for me. I start to get antsy to get home 2-3 days before we are due to leave, yet still wish I wasn't leaving.

Rather than try & get wet suits dry overnight for packing we decided to have a 'dry' last day, and the family vote went to the Eden Project. It's a firm favourite with the 10 year old, although we've learnt to space visits out every couple of years (so overkill of the domes). For the smallest one, its still very exciting, she doesnt remember much from the last visit.

We ate lunch in the Eden Bakery, the new self serve restaurant, under my-kind-of flying critters. Food is prepared in the main section, and customers self serve a portion on a plank of wood, help themselves to a hanging cup, fill, eat & drink. At the end, and you tell the staff what you ate, & pay up - according to one of the staff there is a 95% honesty rate.

And the food was delicious....

I so want some of thease....

And she so wanted one of these...

And there was den building for the boys...

We ran out of time, but will be back. The Eden project isnt a cheap ticket, but once registered, the tickets are valid for a year, and you can get a really good, activity packed day out of it, with no sneaky extras to pay for...

Then we headed off to Sam's on the beach at Polkeris. It is our favourite place to eat in Cornwall. The other half to Sam's at Fowey, it has been created out of a beautifully converted old Lifeboat house. Dinner looking out over the harbour. Bliss.

And waffles outside - now he really looks happy....

We squeezed every sun kissed last drop of the evening down at the tiny harbour, soaking it all up....

Precious days indeed - wonder what it'd be like at Christmas??

:: It was good in Cornwall :: Part One

2011-08-28T22:31:00.003+01:00

:: To discover new beaches - Godrevy on the West Coast, a National Trust beach ::

:: Parking on the cliff, with the shortest of walks down to wide open coves of golden sand & crystal clear blue waters for as far as the eye could see ::

:: It was good to see the smiles on my 10 year old as he scampered like a mountain goat on the rocks ::
:: Water, sand, rocks. All he needs ::

:: It was so good, that we went back again ::

:: This time we called in at Hell's Mouth Cafe for lunch, which was delicious, and very well priced ::

:: Following the advice of a lovely gentleman, who informed my small people that they would be able to see seals further up the beach (true indeed, much excitment too) we wandered up to Hell's Mouth Cove::

::Sadly for such a beautiful place, he also told me it is also known as a suicide spot - it was so very moving to look at the local church number, offering support in times of need, pinned on the fence ::

:: It was good to visit Port Issac. To wander down the steep streets of fishing cottages ::

:: To the working Harbour ::

:: Small one collected sea glass & pottery treasures ::

:: And I had a serious case of the wanties in this emporium of wonderful things ::

:: As the sun came out, we walked the path back to the car park, overlooking the sea & it was good ::

:: It was good to revisit Polzeath Beach::
:: Our family works well on the beach, we've developed a rythm that suits all :: I have my tent, to shelter me from the sun & in which I sit & read, watch, cuddle & nourish from ::

:: Small one builds sand castles ::

:: And here we stay - late into the evening. Tucking into hot Cornish Pasties as the tide makes it way in ::

:: Squeezing every drop out of a beautiful chilled day.

:: And as the darkness takes hold, late at night, I strip off small people, dry them off & wrap them up warm - I do think G is big enough to sort himself out, so don't offer ::

:: Hot camper drinks ::

:: Its also good to slow down and watch & listen to the smalls people, eaves drop on their conversation, take in their growing personalities - ponder on what their future holds, whilst sometimes still wishing I could have them little again ::

:: I asked G ? When did the 10 year stop shouting out the make of the tractor that passed us on the roads? Something that was so much a part of his early years, has stopped & I hadn't realised till now. Then I notice a 7 & 10 year old reading the cartoon strips in the Daily Mail - and laughing, as only children can, at the silliness of adult humour ::

:: Yes, its all been good ::

Lx

Can I also add a big thankyou for all your lovely messages on my last post - & also say 'Hello" to Jayne, thankyou so much for your comment!

Life in the Slow Lane....

2011-08-16T00:51:00.000+01:00

Hello, I'm still here, pootling along, in the slow lane of life for a while. Twelve have relocated again to Cornwall, this time in our beautiful camper, top speed of 61mph (once) on the way down from Derbyshire, yes life definitely in the slow lane.

I've not been well recentley, having finally gone to the GP & been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes & Anaemia. It explains why I was feeling so very, very, tired & wanting to sleep 24/7, and why the Mars Bars wern't working. So I am currentley off work, as I take time to rest & recover, & with the support of a brilliant GP & Practice Nurse, for the medication and lifestyle changes to start to work.

I'm learning to live life at a slower pace.

And now we are down in Cornwall. It's a quieter holiday than we would usually have, I certainly won't be walking up to Tintagel Castle this stay, not enough oomph. But there is much pleasure & goodtimes in the simple things....

'Get me mum' jumps on Megavissy Harbour....

Warm water & sand on bare feet....

Warm towel snuggles. Just the best mummy beach activity ever....

G doing the male hunter/gatherer thing, our very own Bear Ghryllis....

Improvised Noughts & Crosses....

Our family favourite being played in the Camper Van....

Drinking coffee at Portreath beach....

As small one plays with shadows....

Watching as my boys bond....

As the sun sets....

It's good in the slow lane once in a while.

Lx

Twelve in Chaos - But it's all good...

2011-06-20T17:19:00.000+01:00

OK, so when I first started blogging in 2009, it was about finding balance to my chaotic working mum, life.

I wanted to find a balance, to have my cake & eat it. Work hard, but have a lovely home, that had 'me' stamped on it. Not a practical sensible home, but one where there was order balanced with creativity amongst the small people & G who also happen to live at Twelve.
I wanted to balance my caring roles as a mum, wife, nurse & housekeeper, with the creative person that nearly went off to Uni, the book reading Lydia, who somehow wanted that Enid Blyton life for her small people.

Somehow 2010 went astray with life changing events that overwhelmed & shifted dynamics. 2011 is shaping up so differentley.

Now I have to be honest - It's took years to fall in love with Twelve. Yup, I must sound an ungrateful monkey, but I loved beyond measure, my old house.

A 3 bedroom terrace, 100+ years old, that was quite literally falling down when aged 24 I brought it as a newly qualified nurse. I was maxed out on the mortgage, working full time & extra in nursing homes on the side, but with help from my dad & his toolbox, a freindly ex called G (who claimed to love DIY & was pretty good at it too), I got there. I loved every wonky wall, the high ceilings, the neighbours, the stripped pine dressers, the nooks & crannies filled with just lovely 'things', the curtains made from ticking & duvet covers by my mum. It was homely.

Switch to 18 months of marrige & a new baby & we realised the house wasnt working any more for us. So by off chance, on the way to Mum & Dads on New Years Eve 2000, we drove onto a new estate in the next 'village'. There, in the smattering of snow we peered through the windows of the show home, of the house that is now 'Twelve'.

We broke our necks to find the money, took a risk, & I went back to work when my little one was 3 months old, to help finance the move. At the time I was struggling, numb from wonky hormones.

When we finally moved in the realisation of the new straight walls, low ceilings, new neighbours, new furniture - New Flippin Everything hit me. And I missed my old home.

Fast forward (10 years this August) & I am now in love with Twelve.

It's took years to find how I wanted my home to feel, to feel comfortable in its skin, rather than just functional. I think a home is always evolving to meet the needs of those in it & perhaps the reason why I have finally fallen in love with my house is that now, over time, it has finally evolved into meeting some of my emotional needs too.

G has come to learn how important it is for me to create my home, & that my need for some organisation & control, is so that I can cope with working & him being away a lot. We had some really good converations in Cornwall, of what we wanted for now & the future for us as a couple & a family & it was good to hear each other.

I also feel like we as a family are moving into that 'memories for the future' territory. O & S are 10 & 7, just about the ages where I can recall really strong childhood memories. I want to have a home full of love, laughter & good memories for them to take into their future, much like I had.

& then the penny dropped.

It's ok talking & not so ok fretting about not getting it right, but at some point, something has to change to get that balance. Try as I might, G wasn't wearing the 'I'll give up work & make sure that your tea will be on the table at 6pm' argument, & i swear he nearly left the country (again) when I mentioned baby number 3, and the saving on childcare me not working would have.

So, for the past few weeks, armed with coffee, coke & a cry of "Sleep is for the weak" I have been turning Twelve upside down. It is now a home that works, all the rooms have a sense of purpose & reason - there are no 'lost' rooms.

I can now appreciate the newness, and have learnt to adopt my decorating style to fit with it.

I am tired, but it is a good tiredness, one of achievement. There are still weeks ahead to go, but Twelve is taking shape, the smalls are loving the shift round of rooms, and I am falling in love all over again with my house that feels like my kind-of home.

I'm also kind-of likeing G too, after all this man puts up with my pebbles in a jar, and has relented & gone up ladders this weekend to paint the stair walls, when he admits he doesn't really like DIY, and would much rather be working on his bus.

Ah, yes, our bus. He's in the final stages of turning from a bus to a camper. We are excited beyond measure, & I can see Enid Blyton type days ahead in him.

& sweet peas. I could never grow sweet peas at my old house. They are my favourite summer flower. But they grow well here at Twelve.

Tells me something, no?!

If youv'e made it to the end of this post, Thankyou. I'd love to share this journey, would you be interested?

Lx

Wise Words Found

2011-06-09T21:24:00.000+01:00

I hope that my child looking back on today,

remembers a mother who had time to play

Children grow up while you're not looking,

there'll be years ahead for cleaning and cooking

So quiet now cobwebs, dust go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep...

Twelve Goes to Cornwall

2011-04-17T23:49:00.001+01:00

For the next week, we have left Number Twelve and are living here in this beautiful cottage

Near St Austell

We've stayed here many times before, so it feels like home from home....

Only a lot tidier!

Today we popped into Charlestown to have a late lunch at Charlies

It's been a firm favourite since we discovered it last Easter -

With toast almost the same size as small person

We wandered down to the harbour - past these stunning tulips

Admiring the old whitewashed fishermans cottages

Past the boats

Down to the harbour walls

All in the most glorious sunshine - It felt like August, not April

Small person went pebble hunting

Whilst Tall One people watched

We then drove to Portholland stopping for an ice cream from here -

and walked from the East Harbour to the West Harbour

Where Small Person made freinds and painted Pebbles

and Tall one found Towers on the beach

Then it was back home for a sunny evening tea

Todays Treasures .....

& G proving he's still got the touch with the ladies....

I am looking forward to the rest of the week, time to unwind and have time with those I love most in the world..

It's been a tough week leading up to this break, one thats made me want to wrap my arms around my familly & squeeze them tight. One thats made me count my blessings

Do the same to your loved ones, wherever you are, and be happy in the moment.

Lx

The Best Things in Life are Free......

2011-04-11T22:51:00.002+01:00

:: Heart Shaped Ice Cubes in Lime Cordial in a Green Glass ::

:: Wild Daffodils on the way home from the Dentist in Grindleford ::

:: Spirea Branches - From a weekend of Gardening ::

:: A Smattering of Summer Freckles - Sun Kisses for a Seven Year Old ::

:: Discovering the Dicenta in Full Bloom after a harsh winter ::

:: Open Windows letting in a Warm but Fresh Breeze ::

:: Forget me Nots - From the Garden ::

:: Blue, Blue Sky ::

:: Musscari from the Garden - In an old school Milk Bottle ::

:: Tiny Blooms against a Ben Simmons Clock::

:: Colour ::

:: Sunlight Sparkles up the Walls & on the Ceiling - My Favourite Place for an Afternoon Rest ::

:: Handmade Mothers Day Card from my 7 Year Old ::

:: Yes, I really do look like this! ::

This weekend, I heard Janet Jackson & Luther Vandross on the Radio
It brought back memories of past Summers & inspired this post.

Wishing you all a week of Free Best Things

31 Things for 31 Days

2011-04-01T00:14:00.002+01:00

1. How the time has flown since my last post - 31 days ago.

2. The 10 year old has completed all 7 Harry Potter Books

3. Suprise & Delight at finding the Earagon Books for £1.99 (thankyou Louise for pointing me in the direction of them)

4. I have discovered the delights of Saturday morning shopping with Tea & Toast in a cafe with my 7 year old, and having the time to sit & listen to whatever is foremost in her mind.

5. I drove to Barnsley (3 times!) for a 3 day communication course. Okay, this is huge for me, I don't like driving to new places, especially motorway driving. I had to be Very, Very, brave....

6. I survived being videoed with an actor for a role play session during the course (inner thespian truly released).

7. We've had glorious sunshine here in Derbyshire, and oh how the first blast of spring sunshine lifts the soul!

8. First picnic tea of the Summer

9. The ice cream van starting its round again - Its been calling for 10 years & heralds summer arriving. That's 4 99's with sauce & sprinkles please...

10. Rediscovering Marmalade on toast. A forgotten pleasure.

11. Having our first barbeque of 2011 (eating indooors though)

12. Spring bulbs flowering in the Sunshine

13. Spring flowers & Shadows

14. Lemon Easter Cupcakes

15. Steaming Coffee in New Mugs (Note to self - I drink too much Coffee when tired or overwhelmed with juggling)

16. From a favourite shop

17. Realising its good to take time out to just to potter in some of my favourite places, especially after an hour of dental treatment & a very numb mouth!

18. Created Gallery's new Premises.

19. Trying not to laugh at the 7 year old as she tries to bond by discussing cars with her big brother - She likes 'Spaghetti Veyrons'.

20. Breathing a sigh of relief at Parents Evening - Phew, a teacher who gets my son.

21. Choosing Curtain Fabric for our bus (we went for the red & blue on the left).

22. Legless Barbies

23. Chocolate Maderia Cake - 4 pints, 2.5 hours to bake

24. Hallelujah!

25. Red Nose Day Silly Socks - Dare I admit that I glued the pom poms on whilst my daughter was wearing insitu - with a glue gun? It wasn't till she quietly mentioned how warm it was that I realised the glue had slightly seeped through her socks. My daughter has had her first leg wax.....

26. Red Nose Day Cookies for the 10 year old.

27. Finally after over a year (seriously), taking 5 minutes to glue & fix the bed angel. One happy small person.

28. Smug smile to self at the double headed tulips from the village green grocers.

29. And big excitment at finding Parrott Tulips in the Grocers a week later.

30. Seeing our bus being transformed from this....

31. To this....

Thinking about the adventures we hope to have in him as a family

Umm I think that was 32 things!

Life has been busy, & sometimes its easy to forget the pleaure in the day to day ordinary things, as well as taking pleasure in the extraordinary.

Hope you have all had a good 30 days, and thankyou so very much for your lovely comments you left on my last post - I hope to get back to you all soon.

Lx

:: I :: Heart :: Books ::

2011-03-04T00:14:00.001Z

:: It's been World Book Day Today::

And smallest person dressed up as her favourite book character

:: Mr Mole :: from Wind in the Willows ::

Now I have to admit, dressing up days fill me with terror - Have I got the right day? is usually the first thought, as I sneak a peak at other children on the way to school

:: Yes, plenty of Dorothy's and Superheros ::

Then there is the panic as small one says she wants to be a mole.

:: Not a princess - no, that would be far to easy, as we already have plenty of princess clothes ::

There is a flashback to the time I sent my 3year old to school as a Knight, the only one in a homemade costume, and his teacher kindly pointing out, that his tin foil covered wellies had shed all over the Nursery.

:: No prizes with the teacher there then, despite the 3yr old wearing black glittery tights in leui of chain mail trousers ::

And then the reminder by the husband that small person is worried about wether her outfit would be ready.

:: As he boards a plane for 3 days away - & I am juggling work, smalls & house ::

I am a mummy who responds well to pressure though. Thankfully, rolled up big brother's trousers & waistcoat come in handy. A Blue Peter moment with the pipe cleaners, and

:: Ta-Da! Mr Mole and a happy small one ::

:: I love books whatever day it is ::

As a child I read early, and grew up with my nose in a book. Being sent to my bedroom was bliss in a house of 6 children... Childhood memories of Enid Blytons Faraway Tree, & Wishing Chair. Reading my mum's 'What Katie Did' books. Tucking my book under the duvet, so I could read in the light summer evenings when I should have been asleep. Teachers reading, and leaving us at the end of day, wanting the next chapter....

Growing up with books full of romance & passion, thinking, hoping that life would immitate art....

Still now, I read whenever I can. There is always a pile of books at my bedside, inviting, tempting me to pick up and read... Distracting me from the house work, taking me away from the day, quietening my mind.

:: How I dislike a book that doesn't grip me, or limps to an end. Frustrating. What a waste of anticipation and excitment ::

I like a book that I learn from, or that takes me away, challanges my preconceptions. A book that makes me laugh, or one that makes me weep. A book that I can still feel days/weeks after I read it.

I measure holiday's by the books I have managed to read

:: I am lucky to have one natural reader. She loves her books almost as much as her mum ::

The 10 year old has been far different. He struggled to read initially, with the concentration of a gnat, reading just wasn't his thing. Unless it was short factual reading. Big hits have been the annual Guiness Book of Records, or books about inventions, tractors, dinosaurs....

But a story book? No way, never, not on your nellie...

:: Until Cosmic Boy - which rocked his reading world ::

Superficially I have to admit, I liked the shiny jacket, & I really was just trying in desperation.... He picked it up, and didn't want to put it down. I had to listen to potted snippets at the dinner table. I realised he may have some of his mum in him after all. I gave thanks....

:: Then his honorary Aunty L bought him the first two Harry Potter Books ::

Now there is no stopping him, one Amazon shop later and he is on the penultimate book. He sets his alarm in the morning, so he can read for an hour before school.

There was even some serious half term PJ wearing reading. I think it has helped that he hasn't seen the films, so the books are holding his attention and his imagination is running riot...

:: Now I am looking for the next book to feed him ::

And G?

Well you can't have it all ways, & really his bed time reading is quite interesting, and could be worse....

Finally, I have discovered this book - It is a gem, and I think it deserves a post of its own....

:: Perhaps you will indulge me? ::

Love Lydia xx

Love :: Friendship :: Love

2011-02-23T15:33:00.002Z

Love :: For the man who took me away to the City I Love

Freindship :: Being joined by our mutual freinds

Love :: My Favourite Department Store

Love :: Big bunches of my favourite flowers, that wouldn't survive the plane home.

Love :: For the man who carried a Bag of Bulbs home

Love:: In the moment - My son, who loves his bed, I-touch & Harry Potter books,
& who at 10, still loves Eyeore beyond measure (tucked under his arm)

::Friendship - Half term sticking with best friend

Friendship :: Thankyou cards for having another little friend to play

Friendship:: The colleague who cared enough to bring me flowers

:: Freindship - Because she recognised that I am struggling with work at the moment

Freindship:: When an unexpected gift arrives from a blog freind

Love :: Made with Love

Love :: Our new arrival - before he left sunny California for damp Derbyshire.

:: Love & Freindship - Looking towards days full of Love & Freindship::

Three Words

2011-01-31T22:41:00.002Z

Each year Cherry chooses a word for the year - it reflects what she hopes for the coming months.
I have found this one of the most delightful things, and as she often does, it inspires others, includng myself.

This year I have choosen 3 words to guide & inspire me.

1. ORGANISATION
Yep, I know its boring, but not being organised leads me into all sorts of misery & mayhem. Long term readers may remember this incident... & I hate to say that since then, despite running a calendar, & keeping all school letters in gender identifiable folders, and generally doing my damndest, I have still had two similar close misses. So this year I am adding a second diary (the big red one is my work one), a small one for the handbag.

I also need to get back on top of the house, last year it slipped & the clutter bunnies have had a riot. I will never be a minimalist type of person, there are just to many things that lift my soul & fill me with happiness to not leave around.

However I do not want to spend my days off being a slave to the duster, life is just too short. So my 'lovely things', will be simplified.

I do, however give up trying to organise G!

2. SPONTANEITY
One of the best days I had last year, was a last minute decision to take the smalls out for a picnic straight from after school club, and now I want to do it more often. Also this year we have agreed as a family that at least once a month we will take time out and spend it as a family. Life can be too hectic, with weekends feeling as busy as the weekdays. We are going to take time out as a familly to stop.

3. No
I need to learn to say NO.

No to others.

No to myself - No I do not need that Mars Bar, & just because I baked them, doesn't mean I need to eat them (all).

So how am I doing at the end of this first month of 2011?

Well, I continue to feel strangely motivated to decutter & clear, I am on first name terms with the young man in our charity shop, and the skip on the drive is testement to my determination.

Umm, no real episodes of grand spontaneity, & our January afternoon at Sutton Scarsdale was hampered by rain & hail, but I am sure that will come as the weather improves.

& No? Err I have joined Weight Watchers, but this No thingy is taking some practise. I have however said no a couple of times to things that really would have put me under unecessary pressure, and felt better/relieved for doing so, & the people I said No to are still speaking to me, so I really don't need to worry so much about saying No.

Thankyou for reading through my ponderings - I think I will be posting more over the next 11 months on these words.

I will be back soon to tell you all about our soon to be expected new arrival - he's going to have a huuuge impact on our familly, and we are all sooo excited, he really is a dream come true!

Love Lydia x

ps - He's not a baby.

Looking Back and Looking Forward

2011-01-18T01:38:00.002Z

Looking back on the highlights of a personally tough year, 2010, and celebrating the good.

Easter weekend family day trip to Crich Tramway museum for the 40's weekend....

Taking time out a the nature trail walk....

I spy my handsome boy....

We welcomed our neice, much adored by her cousins....

And had two weeks in our beloved Cornwall....

Sandy toes....

Fishing Villages....

New walks discovered....

And our history explored....

New favourite Cafes found - Charlie's in Charlestown....

Simple summer joy at home....

The large 'paddling pool' - a magnet for the children on the close, giving us a garden of laughter & fun for the summer

We learnt lots about Camper Vans....

From interiors....

To 'Empi Stripes' on chairs....

And the amazing curtains available....

& I have learnt about eveything from splits to early & late bays, what is the 'rat' look & all about the buzz surrounding patina...

September sees new school shoes.... 6 & 12, for a 10 & 7 year old

The smalls had their first visit to the Netherlands....

& experienced Dutch celebrations....

As well as the bikes....

November saw special memory time as my smallest, became the smallest member of the Joseph Choir when it came on tour to Sheffield....

And I watched her all in love with the city - yes, she wants to live here when she grows up!

Baking has provided pleasure as well as calories....

Christmas arrived in a somewhat chaotic state, but, hey, I got there!

And through the stress of the lead up & work being very busy, in the darker moments, there were moments of peace, and light....

And now, I am looking forward to 2011, with a sense that this is going to be a good year.

I feel like I am emerging from a mist, with a renewed energy, and that finally life is filling with colour again....

I am looking forward, full of hope, of shared plans with my family & G, and plans for myself.

So here's to 2011 & all that it brings.

I wish for us, all a year of blessings and joy. Laughter & freindship. Good things.

Three Thoughts

2010-12-17T00:55:00.000Z

Goodness the past week as flown! With the slow thaw finally happening after all the disruptions of the snow, the normal rhythm of life is steadily returning. G is back from his travels, jet-lagged and just a little grumpy.... and the weather induced pressure at work is also easing.

A little late, and with not one Christmas card written, or present wrapped, we start preparing for Christmas with oomph tomorrow.

I usually find Christmas a huge stress, and normally end up in floods of 'I am a failure' tears by Christmas Eve. I become overwhelmed with the pressure to create the perfect lead up too, and the perfect Christmas day.

Last year we had a very simple Christmas, it was a painful time, just a few weeks after the loss of G's mum, and we missed her presence dearly. It did make me look at what was important for us as a family at this time of year.

There have been three things this week that resonated with me, and I hope you don't mind me sharing them with you...

One....
'Next year I hope mummy will have the house straight, so she can do special Christmas things with me'

A conversation between my 7 year old and my mum, during their day out at Chatsworth House, where they are celebrating Christmas with a Russian theme.

Ouch!

Me? I was at home tidying.

I want my children to have strong, warm, happy memories when they are older. They won't remeber a tidy house.

Two
It's the simple unexpected things that give rise to unexpected intrigue, questions and excitement.

The £2.50 mini box of satsumas from the grocers....

Why are they in a box? Who gets to keep the box? How many can we eat? Why don't they come like that in the supermarket?

Three
I get to spend time with the most extraordinary people living ordinary lives. During one visit this week I had one of the most bitter sweet moments of my life.

In a room filled with the most beautiful music, I learnt from a remarkable person, the periods of music filled silence, said as much as the spoken word.

I will carry that moment will be with me, and when I feel tense or anxious about getting it all right & perfect, I will hold that moment.

It's not about the trimmings, homemade vs readymade, the pressure. Its about life, love, family and the future.

So this weekend, in between the 'fettleing' and tree decorating, you will find me with my smalls on the floor, making paper chains, following the 7 year olds special time with mummy request.

Are they not the most delicious paper chains? I admit to being a smidge excited about getting my hands on them, but not as much as my daughter....

Thursday Thoughts......

2010-12-09T15:02:00.000Z

Mmmm which one will I eat first with my cup of tea?

Or should I say 3rd? As there were 8 Frostie Fancies in the box....

I really think I'm going to need some cakey energy to tackle this little lot....

Hope you are all having a lovely Thursday

Lx

39

2010-12-08T00:32:00.001Z

This weekend I celebrated my erm, uhh, ohhh, 39th Birthday. Just one year left till I have to move up to the next age group in anti-wrinkle creams - 20's, 30's, just can't say it yet's.....

The day started well - small people brought me breakfast in bed - tea, toast & cuddles, always good......

Despite the heavy snow, I ventured out to have morning coffee with a friend and a mooch round my favourite shops on Chatsworth road, Libby's, Created, Harley's and Moo Moo's. After 3 days in the house I had a good dose of cabin fever, so the time out was fab.... Even if it was a nervous tramp through the snow. My poor friend was witness to my 2 left feet and lack of traction control....

I treated myself to this lovely felted flower at Created, which I think cheers up my winter coat, along with my favourite striped scarf. I love this gallery, it's full of unique, locally sourced creations, very reasonably priced.

On Saturday evening we braved it as a family over to Buxton to see a production of Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol at the Pavilion theatre. It's the first time we have been to the Pavilion, usually we go to the Opera House, which is just stunning, and holds lot of special memories for me.

Whilst the Pavilion theatre lacked the atmosphere of the Opera House, the production was excellent, it held my 10 year olds attention, and it was a lovely family outing, made all the more special by mum and dad joining us.

I am looking forward to the next 12 months, my 30's have felt like a long hard slog at times, pregnancy (think whale) the early years of babies, toddlers, which you wish you could get back, minus the overwhelming knackeredness, and a good dollop of worrying..... so here's to my final year of being in my 30's, I have a feeling its going to be a good year!

On a final note we are still struggling with snow & ice here in my little patch of North Derbyshire. This morning it was -16 outside, and the side roads are just sheet ice, very scary as I have lost control of my car twice in the past 24hours. My 10 year olds school has been shut again today, due to the heating breaking down, and to be honest, its getting quite boring/tiring now, and it doesn't even look pretty anymore (although a small pink person still looks pretty it).

It's even stopping me from wearing my birthday presents from G (brought back from America at a hugely discounted price compared to the UK)....

Not that G has too worry about ice, work & small people - he's nice and warm in Taichung for the next 12 days - Ba Humbug.

Lx

No longer wondering if I am Waving or Drowning....

2010-12-03T22:49:00.001Z

Helllloooo, its me, back after a rather long bloggy break.

It's been a fair few months, but I have needed time away, to look at myself, life and all around me. I've needed time to start to almost 'mend myself', I didn't realise just how tired I had become until I went away in the summer, and slept at almost every opportunity. It's still a journey I am on, and I've been blessed to have had some incredible support.

It was a comment by the very lovely Floss on my blog title that made me think, (realising that there was a not too happy poem about wether a man was waving or drowning), that this saying was not what I want to be defined by.

So here I am - Twelve, tales of life and love behind the grey door. This is my home.

A home of my own is all I have ever wanted, since making the decision to buy my first house at the age of 24 as a single newly qualified nurse. Whilst others were out painting the town red, I was earning extra money in nursing homes, to create my own home.

Now home for me has 2 smalls, a pile of ironing often found to be kissing the ceiling, 2 cats, 4 fish, cobwebs, and a husband (at times...when he isn't off abroad).

I still nurse, I care passionately about my job. It's the best job, and at times the worst job, sometimes it weighs heavy on me, and it takes days to remove things from my mind. I am now learning coping mechanisms to keep the balance in check.

So thankyou, all of you who have stuck by me, and continued to follow during my absence, and hello to new friends, I will be stopping by to say hi soon....

In the meantime, I'll leave you with some pictures of my little patch of North Derbyshire over the last few days.....

Despite the meanest set of winter tyres on my chunky monkey car, I have been well and truly snowed in!

Lx

PS - If anybody is kind enough to have me on a side bar link, please could you chuck my old blog title away, and replace it with my new one? Thankyou kindly!

Tea on the Tops

2010-06-19T21:40:00.001+01:00

Curbar Gap - Thursday Tea Time

I picked up the small people from after school club, grabbed the picnic blanket, trainers, sausage rolls & flapjack. 15 minutes later we were having tea on top of the world.

I think these were the finest cherries ever eaten, sat munching and looking at the stunning views.

Small people clambered & explored.

Checked out some ye olde worlde graffitti

& chatted to G - In Holland

"Dad guess where we are?"

We waved at Grandma & Grandpa - who didn't wave back...

(G&G's house is bang in the middle of the picture)

It was good - to be spontaneous, to enjoy what is on our doorstep. To sit back & watch them being children, to share in their delight.

I went home with two tired, but very happy smalls, excited by their adventure. Helped along by popping into G&G house on the way home, & my mum bathing them, ready for bed.

I've not blogged for a while, for personal reasons - So thankyou for standing by me & to those who checked up on me, hugs. Also "Hello & Welcome!" to those of you who have so kindly joined me in the past few weeks. I will get round to catching up with people as soon as I can.

I'll be back soon. I need to boast about winning a giveaway (yes! me! - soo never usually happens), & Taz has chucked me a challange (pants! - will have to use some brain power)

I also have a project that we have started over here, both myself and the smallest one are beside ourselves with excitment. Poor G is nearly a broken man....

Love Lydia xx

Easter Week - Part Two

2010-04-02T22:11:00.003+01:00

Scrumptious!

Meet StEGGosouras - The 9 year old had an egg decorating competition at school this week...

And little miss had oodles of fun decorating her Easter Bonnet - Less most definatley is not more....

I have also baked Easter Cookies with the 9 year old. It was lovely to spend the one on one time with him, so rare nowadays. He spends so much time with his dad cycling at the weekend, it feels as if it is boys together, girls together at our house. Does anyone else find this? Anyway, I digress....

Golden Syrup Cookies

100gm Margarine/Butter

75gm Soft Light Brown Sugar

Creamed

2 tbs Golden Syrup

Added

175gm SR Flour

Folded In

100gm Chocolate (I used Eggs - Crushed & I like Smartie Eggs as they keep their bright colour)

and added

Form into small sized drops

Make between 12 & 18 depending on your preffered size

Wait patiently as they bake for 8-10 minutes at 160c (fan oven)

& mmmmm....

Enough for the smalls & us girls at work....

The Easter banner was inspired by the Emma Bridgewater card that came through the post.

G kindly (after some pouting - from me) photocopied & enlarged the postcard. I then happily sat and cut out chickens & eggs, and threaded them onto ribbon.

Only trouble is G thinks that you cannot tell them apart clearly enough...

I can though, probably because I spend more time at the kitchen sink...

Love Lydia xx

Easter Week - Part One

2010-03-30T16:55:00.003+01:00

We are getting into the Easter mood over here, the Valentines wreath had a little makeover to get things started. G has been amazingly tolerant in accepting what I've been up to. I'm hoping to make it a week focusing on special time with the smalls, and looking at what Easter means to us. We will be incorporating Floss's Easter story into our week as well as crafting and creating through the next few days.

I must just tell you, I love these eggs - They remind me of marshmellow biscuits (not that I have licked them of course!)....

After a lovely morning on Sunday watching the 6 year old in her end of term drama school production, where she sang, danced & acted her little heart out & I nearly popped with pride, she and I decorated the Pussy Willow. Great excitment was had by both of us.

Last year we used a branch - which looked lovely, but dropped everywhere.

Work has been busy, so as a cheer-me-up I've treated myself (a whopping £1.20) to bright yellow daffodils for my Clare Gage vase. Sunshine for the evenings.

And G is back from his travels, bringing nice bags....

for a stationary obsessed wife....

And not so nice ones, for a stationary obsessed wife.

I'm off now to turn this into a StEGGosaurous with the 9 year old

And help the 6 year old create a bonnet for the parade on Thursday.

See you Soon

Love Lydia xx

I have had to Pause in Lent for weeks 2,3,4 (& even 5 is now late)

2010-03-23T23:26:00.001Z

Hello. Very bad blogger here. 4 weeks without posting. A bit one sided. Taking pleasure from others blogs. Not offering back.

Unfortunately I had picked up a bug - not flu, but whatever it was has taken a while to shake off, and I have felt lousy for the past 3 weeks. The warning signs were there. I was feeling really tired, a bit antsy, and running on autopilot - that sense that you are exisiting, but not having time to feel. Work had gradually started to run away from the 30 hour week to full time + hours. I was leaving before the little people were going to school, and arriving home after they had gone to bed. My five-a-day was coming from the large packets of Jelly babies (well they do contain real fruit juices) being consumed as I dashed from one place to another.

Unable to sleep due to an over busy mind, I even got up at 4.30am one morning to work my way through the ironing pile - It was that or go to work nudey rudey....

So come the week of my annual leave - when I had planned to tackle the house work, get some organisation done, and be a better mum, my body went

- ENOUGH -

It has been a case of physician heal thyself.

So for the past 2+ weeks I have slept lots, pottered, rather than trying to work my way through unacheivable lists. I admitted defeat when the bug went on my chest & I was coughing like I was on 40 park drive a day, and went to the GP for antibiotics. I acknowledged I wasn't well enough to work, and took time off.

And I have thought, reflected and pondered.

In amongst all this, there has been some truley delightfull highlights. Above is the card from Angel - my swap partner in Michela's Venus swap - guess what my theme was?

I never really understood peoples facination for Yankee Candles until Beki sent me a Sweet Violet Tart as a congratulation gift last year - (then I did get it!) So I was delighted to recieve this candle - luxury!

& some Rose scented bath products to pamper myself with (well needed), and finally, my very favourite Rose Creams - Scrumptious indeed.

Thankyou so much Angel!

There has also been some Birthday Baking occurring. Firstly for one of our team at work - Lemon and Lime Cup Cakes. They looked so happy and spring like, and tasted delicious if I may say so myself, with mouth wateringly tart buttercream icicng.

My sister also has a birthday party, so I baked again, making the same Lemon & Lime Cup Cakes, however I used fuschia pink foil cases, to tie the theme in with her chocolate rocky crispy cakes that were finished off with a sprinkle of fairy dust to match....

I cannot explain how much I enjoy baking at the moment. It is such a simple pleasure.

Another lovely suprise to arrive in the post was this 'Thankyou' parcel from Lisa, who won my 1st Birthday giveaway. Juicy Lucy card!

Who me? Surely not!

It was a huuuge chore to eat this....

And new flip flops! In a large size! Lisa thankyou, you must have done your reading to know I have big feet & love my flipflops...

And finally this floral cuff bangle - so ready for summer now...

One of the good things about enforced slowing down, is that it has really given me time to hear my children. We have talked & listened to each other. With G being away for nearly two weeks in Taipai, I have had the 9 year old attention, which has been lovely, spending more time with him.

Several weeks ago I was thinking through my Pause in Lent 2 post. I had wanted to know what Lent & Easter meant to the children. The 9 year old, suggested that he give up school for lent, however I suggested this wouldn't be workable. He did say that it was sad that Jesus died, and that it wasn't all about chocolate, but more interestingly, he said he liked Easter, because I did things with him, like the Easter tree & Egg hunt. I was expecting great views from the 6 year old, as she is a proper mini praiser, however she threw a strop, so I never found out what Easter meant to her...

I have also learnt a lot from reading others posts. Floss, you have an amazing sense of grace in your writting, and Madhouse wrote about giving up shouting - why did I not think of that? So inspired, I have had a really good try at it myself - & goodness it takes some patience to keep repeating calmly when under pressure. I think it may be starting to work though.

Today I returned to work. I will try & get the balance back. I will look after myself better, so as I can look after others. I will enjoy being in the moment. Taking pleasure in the simple things.

Bathfoamed snowball baby.

& I will leave the Jelly Babies alone.

Love Lydia xx

A Pause in Lent - One

2010-02-22T23:09:00.003Z

Oooh I thought, in a reflective moment, whilst perusing the blog that Floss writes, that sounds interesting. I'd read about 'A Pause in Advent' and some of the comments about how much people found it helpful, to take time out & step back, think & reflect.

I am a very reflective person - almost too much I wonder sometimes - I like to mull things over, chuck in few what if's etc.... We use it a lot at work - Reflective Practice, as away of learning, improving our knowledge, learning through the experience.

So my first thought, having committed myself to this for the next 6 weeks, was what did Lent mean to me? & thinking about it, I don't think I've ever observed Lent.

I was brought up in an active Christian household - hence my biblical name. I think my parents in my early years , would say they were non-denominational, free church people. I cannot remember a lot of 'traditional worship' as a small child, I think there were a lot of house groups, but there was also a strong sense of sharing - and this has sharing has continued to this day with my mum & dad. They offer a very open house, welcoming fellow christians to stay if they need a room for the night when on their travels. I have often said that I could turn up to M&D house, to find a burglar in the house, and I would assume it was one of their friends who'd come to stay.

As mum and dad moved further north, the family settled into a more formal worship, at Baptist, C of E and more evangelical churches.

By the time we moved to Derbyshire, I was in my fully fledged teenage angst years - where what I'd been brought up to believe was questioned, argued - and almost at points, raged against. Peers told me it was 'square' to be in the Christian Society (can any one else remember being 'square'?). I didn't want to stand out - I wanted to blend in with my counterparts, a brief spell of being bullied, had reinforced the need to fit in. Sociology taught me that it was a form of control of the masses, for example Methodism (perhaps the church that I felt most at ease in) with its quiet practice and abstinence, was encouraged by the Mill owners as a way of ensuring well behaved workers. I felt cross at what I saw of people, not practising what they preached, even though my mum, would say that we are only human, not perfect. And most of all I questioned - is there only one right faith? How can good, caring people, suffer eternal damnation, because they were Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish or Christian?

I do not currently attend a church, yet I still feel a sense of faith. I have seen too much, felt too much over the years to believe that death is final. I've witnessed things that cannot be accounted for by medicine or science. I've watched a strong faith be of comfort to those facing death, and those facing the loss of someone. I've watched as people have drawn strength form their faith, and a times felt that things have had a 'helping hand'. I have drawn strength and comfort, given thanks to my God, whom I believe is a kind and caring God, who will hold people in his comfort. I have given thanks for his love (and the odd needed car parking space).

I think I am still on a personal journey - of finding what feels right for me. When I talk to others of what I believe in, I always say, that what gives me faith, strength and comfort is this prayer. It never fails to move me, and it is what I carry in my heart day to day, its how I try to live and practice my beliefs.

The prayer attributed to the 13th century Saint Francis of Assisi, originated in its current form in Franc in 1912. It became known as the prayer for peace, and was widely used as a comfort for the soldiers in WW1. Since then it has been quoted from persons such as Archbishop Tutu, to Margaret Thatcher. Its been widely broadcast in films such as Rambo, to the late Princess Diana's funeral. Mother Teresa used it as part of her morning devotions.

It was also the hymn sung on my first visit to the Hospice Chapel, on my first week in my new job.

Coincidence? or is someone giving me a nudge?

Love Lydia xx

De Bijenkorf - I'm back & I can speak Dutch!

2010-02-21T18:50:00.002Z

We arrived at Amsterdam Central Station, on a cold crisp Friday Evening - So cold that if I talked it steamed my specs up - prompting giggles from me to G, as I uttered those romantic words - 'by eck, you look gorgeous', whilst almost blind....

Good job I had my stripey scarf & gloves ready....

G had told me that we wouldn't be staying any where posh - because the flights weren't cheap, and I was quite happy with this, as the main objective of the weekend, was just to relax & spend time with each other, after what has been a really tough 6 months for both of us. Including a huge fall out the night before (honesty card being held up here) Don't worry I'd said, "It's about being with you....", and he replied "Stop it! - Now you are worrying me..."

So you can imagine my suprise and delight to end up here....

Total Princess status! The room still had the original beam for winching up the trading goods.

The very nice manager told us that the building was a former linen warehouse, and that the hotel had been built around it.

After a lazy breakfast on Saturday morning we set off for a wander aound Amsterdam. It is such a truly beautiful city.

We came across last November for G's Christmas work get together (He works for a company with it's European head office in Holland). At the time it was so very stressful because of his mum being so poorly, so we promised hat we would come back. I admit I fell in love with Holland there and then. I now wish I had discovered Amsterdam years ago, but I admit, being such a home bird, I was put of by the steroetyping of the red light districts and brown cafes.

We walked and talked, at a slow leisurely pace (courtesy of my skating-on-ice episode) over many canal bridges, building our own bridges.

Taking in the picturesque laid back streets, the continental grace, the quiet of minimal car traffic. In Holland cars are taxed heavily & so bikes are hugely popular. They are practical as people live close to where they work, and cyclists are provided with their own paths and well protected by Dutch law.

The architecture is beautiful, tall thin buildings lean, nestle and almost hug together in rows, like books on a bookshelf, not quite straight, and you get the feeling, should one fall, they would all come down. They were built tall & thin (although they go a long way back) as tax was paid, dependant on the frontage of the houses.

I think this is the best picture I took, to show the lovely wonkiness of them all...

And much like a book shelf, there is always the odd one, with a different spine, that makes it stand out from the rest...

G allowed me to chose where we went, and having seen a flyer, I asked to go to the Museum anf Handbags & Purses. It was facsinating, they had examples of the earlieast handbag, through to the modern, and are currentley running an exhibition of British designers.

Look at one of the Tea rooms within it....

And the cake wasn't bad either....

Mmmm Who's that coverting a very expensive hanbag or two...? The British Exhibition room was the only one where we could take photo's. Poor G's face, when I told him how much the very nice classic Mulberry leather handbag was worth....

It was just fabulous - I loved, loved, loved the colours in this little alcove -

Here are the floating flower gardens, greenhouses on the canal....

We passed a Dutch Quilting shop, with this quilt hanging on the railings....

And my second request of the day was to visit 'My Aunts Tart' - Labelled the campest cake shop in town, it was a true test of G's love for me, it was utter kitsch, a riot of plastic flowers, miss matched furnitire & PVC tablecloths - the stuff CK and nightmares would be made of. But the tarts were tasty, and the displays of wedding & party cakes they are famous for were inspirational for any cake decorators who are un-afraid to use colour.

Finally - My third wish was to go to the Bijenkorf - The only dutch word I know. It's the most loveliest department store in Amsterdam - Think a dutch John Lewis.... It was here in November that I brought a christmas card, that I really ought to get round to telling you about...

This is a household range called 'Pip' -

After all our wanderings, with me completeley jiggered, we decided to stop and have our tea in the Bijenkorf, as it was open until 7pm. They have a restaurant that takes up the whole of the top floor, and offers a huuuge choice, so we settled on a stirfrys - cooked to our own order.

Then it was back to our room, for a quiet Saturday night, bottle of wine & Casualty on BBC....

Sunday saw us wake up to snow - and a 2 hour train journey visit some freinds. R grew up in Sheffield lad and G has known him for years & also now works with. He married the lovely J and they live close to the German border. I stupidly didn't take camera for the walk round where they live, although I did tell R, I couldn't imagine why he wanted to leave Sheffield!

We arrived home late Sunday - & it's all too quickly been back to normal day-to-day life.

However it is the first time in 10years, since the small people have come along, that we have done anything like this. It was a special time, a time for relationship building. I think time away from the daily stresses, away from our much loved small people allowed us to focus on each other, remember who we are to each other. It's almost been to easy to be too busy for each other. I think we've realised that we need to continue to take time out to appreciate the other one, to listen and hear, to share our hopes and dreams. Perhaps not on this grand scale, next time closer to home.

(But I really do like Amsterdam)

Love Lydia xx

Valentine - be - mine

2010-02-12T11:36:00.002Z

I'm off somewhere a little bit cold, where they produce these...

Almost beside myself with excitement!

Have a lovely weekend, one & all....

Love Lydia xx

Blue

2010-02-11T00:25:00.002Z

This week I've felt all out of sorts.

It all started on Wednesday when I took a fall on some ice, outside the 6yr old's school. The earth literally went from under my feet, and I landed with an almighty walup on the floor. Much to my embarrassment a nice young man enquired if I was ok, or if I had hurt myself - did I need help in getting up? Oh no, I said, its just my pride that's bruised....

Except it wasn't. No my generously padded coccyx (backside) was also bruised. To the point it hurt to walk, sit down, and drive? I felt everyspeed bump & pot hole known to man was on the stretch of road I needed to drive on. There have been ooh's & aah's in the bedroon, not from passion, but from the pain in my derrier.

Even the small people realised it was bad, when I anounced that I could not bend down to unstack the dishwaher or move the laundry out of the washing machine, and that they would have to help.

I also had to tell them all at work, not to make me laugh, as it hurt my bum, and to say my patients found it amusing that I didn't know how to sit, is putting it mildly.

The weekend was quiet and simple. A steady pottering of housework for me, and glueing & creating with sparkles for her...

I watched as the 9 year old got into his grove with his new bike, practising for his next big race in 2 weeks time, then lovingly, with joy in my heart, washed his sweaty muddy lycra....

And found him practising for when he becomes a teenager....

In an attempt to cheer my backside up, I took it shopping. Chatsworth road is our main road between Chesterfield & Bakewell/Baslow in The Peak District. Over the past 18 months it has started to gain some lovely shops.

Lovely Shops = Lovely Things

Here's a sneaky peak inside Created....

I love Clare Gage ceramics, they are delightfully touchable with their textured surfaces, delicate forms, and would sit comfortably in an uber minimalist environment, or in a more homely one - such as ehemm..

Mine. ...

The use of fabric to provide texture would surely appeal to crafters & vintage/shabby alike? Thease were my two new purchases. Funded by my Birthday & Christmas pennies/pounds

And here they are, joining the others in their new home...

Whilst in Created the lady who runs the gallery (& whom happens to be Clares mum), gave me this -

Think I'll be checking it out, & I bet someone else not so far from me will be too (Diane)

Also on Chatsworth road is a new shop called Moo Moo (How funky is that name?) Of course, it would have been rude not to have a peek in it, and meet Moo Moo a tiny little-terrier-type-handbag-dog-not-in-the-least-bit-woofy...

And it would have been rude to have left this lovely twiggy wired heart - although I think G would have rather me been rude....

Whilst a lovely things shopping is nice, it didn't really cure the unsettledness. I have had this week off work, and as I have pottered around the house today I realised just how tired I am feeling, that sort of all encompassing physical & emotional tiredness that leaves you wanting to nap in the day, fall out with your own shadow, and feel overwhelmed with things.

I feel like I am going round in a cirlce. Never quite on top of things (laundry, housework, tidying, caseload etc). Clock watching, always needing more time as I dash to the next thing (pick up children, traffic etc). Wanting to have a little time for me in amongst being a wife, mother, daughter, nurse.

But the quite stillness of the house has also allowed me to think and reflect. I've had an extrodinary few months, we are still feeling the loss of G's mum, recovering from all that happened. I went back to work post bereavement, at an emotive time of year, to care for people in a similar situation to what I had just been in personaly.

There has been a lot of juggling - my case load at work, childcare, G travelling again, and its been all too much. I think the unsettledness is a nudge to guide my to think about what I am doing, trying to acheive. I know how precious life is, I spend my working days with those who face losing theirs, so I always try to be positive, grateful, thankful for all that I have.

However I've realised I need to look at my time - and how I use it. I need to learn to look after me, so I can continue to look after those I love & care for.

I need to stop stressing. Allow myself to stop trying to be 'perfect'. To enjoy the simplicity & beauty of light & shadows, spring on a snowy day....

And I don't think I am alone, I think that a lot of us can feel this way at times. And I think its ok to feel a bit pants too, so long as its not for too long.

I was listening to Woman's Hour a few weeks ago (yes, get me, cutting egde woman that I am!), and they were talking to the talented Ruthie Henshall. She said some lovely wise words "We spend our time, judging our insides, against the outsides of others". Thoughts to hold onto when I feel like I am drowning, rather than waving....

And finally - on a brighter Ta-Da! note to end.....

The winner of my First Birthday Giveaway is - Lisa at Jumble & Jelly - please pop across & meet her if you havent already - she has a lovely blog, 2 beautiful children & 2 cats. As well as a G like me....

Love Lydia xx

Inspired by....Bertie Meadows & a card....

2010-02-01T23:11:00.003Z

Can anyone remember the postacrd bunting I made for Christmas?

It was inspired by a similar style bunting made the very lovely BertieMeadows. I wrote that I hoped to continue doing similar, changing through the year... I've been slow to change it, as I had grown rather fond of my bonnie snowmen....

But the snow is now long gone, and Spring is on its way. I've tucked the snowmen safely away, and inspired by this fabulous V&A card tried to create a happy colourful string of bunting.... The card uses an original watercolour and wallpaper sample from the mid 18th centuary.

Without any fabulous wallpaper, I settled on some IKEA handmade paper that I had lurking in the wrapping paper stash. How much fun did I have? It gave me a lovely sense of peace to sit and quietly snip away, gathering and processing my thoughts form the day at work. Hands occupied and mind settled.

To get them to hang straight I resorted to ironing them flat & stiffening the paper a with some ehem, hairspray.

It worked, and all I had to do was thread them through some Spring Green organza ribbon....

And ta-da! A row of Tulips cheerfully greeting the spring sunshine.... & a little bit of creating for me....

Looking forward to finishing the February bunting, I have a feeling it will be heart-stoppingly pretty....

Thankyou all for your lovely comments on my cakes in the last post - so very kind! I almost had delusions of giving up the day job.... & if anyone else reading would like to enter for my birthday givaway, please just leave your names - the more the merrier!

Love Lydia xx

Now that I am One...

2010-01-29T23:28:00.001Z

Today is my First Birthday in Blogland - and to celebrate a year of not quite drowning (and waving more than I thought I would), I thought I celebrate with a few cakes....

Little Miss's 5th Birthday & my first attempts at fancy fairy cakes...

Opps! you might need to turn sidewards for this one

6 Months later & I am creating again for my Best Freinds daughter's 3rd Birthday....

I am getting better at the Cup-Cakes....

Do you want a closer peek?....

40th Birthday Cup-Cakes.....

Chocolate Orange

Tangy Lemon

Tinkerbell for Little Miss's 6th Birthday....

And Butterfly Cup-Cakes for all at her party....

And for my not-so-little man at 9?

A huuuge rocky road/crispy cake with a mean looking Transformer on top....

Well life isn't always about the sparkly!

Many thanks to all those who have stopped by, and for all the lovely comments and kind words sent over the past 12 months, it really has meant a lot....

Love Lydia xx

Ps - Will be doing a 1st Birthday giveaway - Leave your name if you want to be included. Will close on Sunday 7th February

A Weekend of Colour

2010-01-17T21:39:00.001Z

Yippee & Woo-Hoo! The snow is gone, and finally it feels like there is colour everywhere. Blue skies above us here in North Derbyshire, without a snowflake in sight....

And green grass - I'd forgotten what the front garden looked like....

The little Miss & I have tinkered our way through the weekend ....

Taking pleasure in the mundane ....

Made flowers for....

Lemon Cup Cakes for a 21st Birthday ....

And Little Miss joined in to....

New glass storage jars with 50's ice cream parlour coloured lids, have been lovingly admired and filled....

and are sitting tidily, and very prettily into thier new home...

Squeaks of delight could be heard whilst looking at the Decopatch paper & glue that arrived via the nice Mr Postman - I can feel oodles of gluey sticky fun to be had....

And absolute utter delight at a certain bunch of tulips brought as a thankyou for making the Cup Cakes...

Just look at those colours. Snow? It's a distant memory....

Love Lydia xx

Greeting 2010

2010-01-08T10:22:00.009Z

2010 has arrived bursting with colour, a sense of new things to come, and a year full of promise.

Christmas was stripped back to basics and kept simple. For the little ones there was still that sense of excitement and we needed the normality after the loss of G's mum at such an emotive time of year. I also returned back to work Christmas week. It was bittersweet time, but important to return to what I do, and I have been so very well supported.

It was amazing what was achieved in a two week period, by keeping it simple. Thank goodness for Amazon & Argos for the little ones, and Thomas Pink for him. A quick luxury shop at John Lewis, followed by a day trip into our local town, to buy from the little independents, those special gifts, wrapped up the present buying.

The wooden nativity always makes my heart sing. It holds special memories of seeing it in a closed shop window in Matlock one evening, and G popping back the next day, knowing how much it would mean to me....

Other trims were simple, adaptations of everyday items....

This cake stand is still in use, too pretty to dismantle as a Christmas decoration only....

And I managed to rustle up a 'thingy' for the door - unfortunately no handsome strangers to grab under the mistletoe....

One of the simplest pleasures were these postcards, picked up in Holland, in November, when we flew out for G's Christmas work's weekend. Amsterdam is a beautiful city, and nothing like I had expected . I fell in love with the early 1900's illustrations.

Inspired by Bertie Meadows string of scented sachet's these snowmen postcards decorated the old pelmet space in the kitchen....

I want it to be a personal project for the year, changing the decorations with the months, adding colour and smiles to the room. Hopefully the little people will help too....

This week I was fortunatley off work - my plan was to tackle the post Chritmas domestic fall-out. However with the snow, a very poorly car, and 2 children to occupy for two days, the huge list I had wanted to achieve has been discarded. Instead it has been wet clothes & wellies, pink cheeks & lots of snuggles & splidging on the settee (in between the scratting & arguing of sibling love).

And instead of letting myself get ratty over what I haven't been able to achieve, I've stepped back, and refocused on taking pleasure in the simple things. Like tulips. Have I ever mentioned my love, love, love of tulips?

Yep, I love tulips. And Hugs. And pink cheeks & noses. Even wet clothes if they have been gained through laughter & joy.

Happy New Year to you all.

Love Lydia xx

Hope

2009-12-07T16:21:00.002Z

Its been a good few weeks since I last posted (well months if I'm honest), but life has changed dramatically for us all in the past 6 weeks. This has not been an easy post to write, and I dearly wish it will not unduly upset anyone who reads it.

I took this picture on my daughters 6th Birthday, Hope is her middle name (& it would have been her first, had the pesky husband not intervened). Hope, because after a tottering old time of it with her brother, I had hoped that my second child would allow me to hope that I was a good mum, and that this time I would enjoy my baby.

However the word hope has been even more pertinent to me in the past few weeks since.

6 weeks ago I sat with my mother-in-law whilst the GP gently told her that she had multiple secondary spreads of cancer in her liver, and that even when they found the original site, treatment would only be palliative.

My feisty 75 year old, 5"2 pocket rocket of a mum, who line danced, rambled, swam & yoga'd her way through the week. My mum who claimed looking after my two little people twice a week kept her young.

Her decline and death last Wednesday morning, was rapid & a huge shock for us all, we are still feeling the full force of what we have faced. But all through the past few weeks I have hoped that she would not suffer, hoped that we would draw strength as a family, hoped that I could be strong to support my husband and children.

The nature of my job has often meant that the children have had open and honest discussion about cancer and about death. I think this has helped in their understanding of what has happened to Grandma. For the 9 year old, Cancer has been explained as a gang of cells misbehaving & not doing what they have been told to do, a bit like teenagers, they have gone where they shouldn't & done what they have been told not to do (Yep, my 9 year old thinks that teenagers are rebels....)

I am so hugely proud of my children - at 6 & 9 they have shown an emotional intelligence that I had not expected, dealing with Grandma's rapidly declining health with amazing sensitivity, yet with a natural approach to it fitting in with daily life.

She died at home, as she had hoped to do, on as ever, her own terms. The hospice and district nursing teams provided the support and care I had only hoped for.

I hoped she would not die on her birthday (or mine), instead it was in between our special days. (I have to admit not knowing whether to put my birthday cards next to the sympathy cards - surely 38 yrs old isn't that bad?!)

I hope that this week that my mum's funeral & cremation is not to distressing for my husband, and most of my little people who wanted to attend, and I hope that I have prepared them well.

I draw strength from knowing that I did all I could to help her, and that I was blessed to have the last conversation with her, to tell her how much I loved her & to thank her for all she had done for me, before she fell into a deep pain free sleep. I have been touched from the kind words & cards of support from the most unexpected people.

I hope that time will be a healer, and that we can gather the memories of her with hope in our hearts that whilst much loved and missed, she will always be with us.

I hope that in the new year we can settle into a new routine of childcare without to much stress for the little ones. I hope that I can settle my mind, so I can go back to work able to do my job well. That a sense of normality will resume.

And finally-

Thankyou for all the lovely posts I have been able to dip & read, to be able to share in the warmth and pleasures of day to day life. It has helped so very much.

Love Lydia xx

Flowers, Coffee & Clutter Bunnies.

2009-09-22T21:52:00.006+01:00

I have decided that I really neeeed to get the house in control, so with G in America for 2 weeks, I have commenced on a huuuge life laundry session. I like things to have a home, I admit I am the IKEA ad man's dream shopper.

Tidiness = Organised = Control - Or at least I am hoping this theory (Theory N.1) works.

Cupboard's have been emptied & there is clutter everywhere (Theory N.2 - sometimes you have to make a mess to get tidy).

I am wrestling with those clutter bunnies like there is no tomorrow.

I've been ruthless & bagged for the recycling centre, charity shops & clothes collections.

Coursework has been put in the paper bank - although I have kept my dissertation as homage to the feeling that I had given birth to it (yes, it was that bad!)

It's going to take a few more weeks to get the house presentable, but with the evenings drawing in, I hope I will be more disciplined.

In the meantime rather than show you my shame, and blog a picture of the spare room - the main culprit in the war against the clutter bunnies - I thought I'd show you Friday's flowers, Asters.

And a pop in a blatant plug....

For Macmillan Cancer Support's Worlds' Biggest Coffee Morning on Friday.

So you don't think I'm plugging for my wages, I should let you know, that whilst I carry the Macmillan title, and am associated with the organisation, I am actually paid by the hospice I work for. Macmillan support me in my job through education & training. However Macmillan isn't just about nurses.....

They are about people, families, carers, living well with cancer.

I never realised just how much this organisation does, until I moved from my old job, into this new post. It has a huge voice (for a charity) in the politcal setting .

But for me, the biggest help in my day to day work, is with finances. From providing of Macmillan benefit advisers (these people really know how to ensure that people get the financial help they are entitled to), to providing one off grants that can allow a family holiday, buy new clothes for someone who has lost a lot of weight, or help break the debt cycle.

So if on Friday, you get the chance of a cup of coffee, please do support. It all helps to make a difference.

Love Lydia xx

Organisation - A Dirty Word

2009-09-16T11:22:00.005+01:00

This September I vowed that I would be a truly organised mummy.

No more phone calls from G asking if I'd remembered it was Harvest Festival, after he'd dropped Little Miss off at school (er, no - because, if I had, then I would have sent in the food goodies). No more handing in trip money at the 11th hour, or forgetting the PE bag....

No, this year I will be soooo in control.

Monday September 7th. Little Misses Red Primary School uniform was laid out ready for her first day. Lunch box & PE bag all organised.

8yr old planning his day at Grandma's - due to his inset day.

Me all content and in control.

G looks out of the window & comments about the neighbours daughter looking all smart in her uniform. I sneak a peak. She looks delightful in her Navy Junior School uniform

Slowly the penny drops.

My heart stops.

I have got the wrong child ready for school.

He has 10 minutes to be at school. No PE Bag ready, no lunch box, & no breakfast (he was on a promise of breakfast at Grandma's).

There were tears - him because he really doesn't like school at the moment, her because she does.

There was stress - me.

There was a quite husband - very wise move.

We managed it though, the 8 year old, by some miracle arrived at school, on time, fed, but no PE bag. The 5 year unceremoniously dumped at Grandma's (I was truly late for work by this time).

I arrived at work & explained and explained why I was late. Did I get sympathy? Lord no! My fellow Mac's were in stitches laughing at me, as much as I was laughing at myself for being such a noodle.

Whilst I wouldn't want to repeat the episode again, my 'organisation' has brought laughter to my patients, when we share our day to day stories, allowing humour to connect us.

Oh Well - Off to try & get organised (Again)

Love Lydia xx

ps - It cost me a Transformer though....

Northumberland - A new love affair has begun

2009-08-31T09:14:00.010+01:00

Sometimes things seem to happen for a reason.

Back in February when I was in my previous job, I found that I would not be allowed 2 weeks holiday together due to the staffing levels & G's travels. This meant that we would not be able to have 2 weeks in Cornwall, as we usually do without incurring long drives.

We settled on Northumberland, having heard from several people how beautiful it is and it is a mere 3 1/2 hours drive from us (well it is if you drive like my husband....)

So last week was spent discovering some of the delights this beautiful place holds.

There were rock pools galore....

And wide expanses of golden beaches, that felt almost deserted, set under rolling skies.

We stayed in Beadnell - and this is the house that always caught my eye as we set out for a days exploring - How I would love to live in something like this....

The children paddled on Beadnell Beach....

Watched the tractor at work, taking out and bringing in the boats....

And there were lots of them too ....

On the harbour front at Beadnell, the Lime Kilns are still present, and were excitedly inspected closely by the little people.

We took a boat ride out to the Farne Islands - choosing the boat company mainly because of its pretty signage....

To everyones delight we saw the seals - and they didn't seem to perturbed by the 8 year olds squeals of excitement. Unfortunately we were to late in the year to see the puffin colonies.

(If you open the picture you can get a better view of them, if not peer closely & they are the squidgy things in the front of the bottom left!)

We also saw Longstone lighthouse, in which Grace Darling & her father lived in the 1830's. It was from her bedroom window - in the white stripe - that she looked out and saw a boat in distress apon the rocks, and she & her dad carried out one of the most famous maritime rescues in this country saving 9 lives. At the age of 23.

After all that hard work sailing - tea just had to be fish & chips by the bustling harbour at Seahouses....

We visited Alnwick twice.

Once to see Barter Books, one of the biggest second hand bookshops in the country, set in an old railway station....

It had a huge mural in the wall, a raised train track running across the tops of the bookshelves....

And books galore....

We finished our morning off, having a lovely lunch in the old waiting room, very tasty & reasonably priced.

Late afternoon was spent on the beach - whilst not overly sunny, it was still warm enough for the little people to get togged up & burn off some energy....

Alnwick is most famous for its Castle - where some of the Harry Potter films are shot. It is also becoming known for its gardens, however heavy rain did stop us from being able to explore fully, and I didn't take as many pictures I would have liked because of it.

We did however have lunch in the Tree House - one of the largest in the world, I felt like I was entering a fairy tale

Not cheap, but it was a real treat to sit high up in thease huuuge wooden chairs,

Surrounded by branches light with fairy lights. It felt like the most magical place to eat in.

Afterwards we wandered round the rest of the tree house, exploring the views, and walking the rope bridges, before heading up to the castle....

One of the things that I really enjoy when walking around historic buildings, is eavesdropping on what tour guides/ volunteers have to say. Fascinating stuff, full of anecdotal stories, not always found in the guide books. For example I learnt that when the Prince & Princess of Wales cane to stay in Northumberland in 1884, they opted to stay at Cragside, with the (not yet Lord) Armstrong's, rather than at Alnwick with the Duke of Northumberland. Why?- because Lord Armstrong had fitted hydro-electricity into his house, and had electric lamps & central heating.

This in turn spurred the Northumberlands to follow suite, after all, they couldn't be outdone by new money! The light fittings externally were pretty impressive too....

There was plenty to hold the little peoples attention, from dressing up as a princess and brass rubbing....

To being a brave night & checking out a dragons dental work....

We also came across the castle cat....

I've already mentioned Lord Armstrong & it was on another very wet day that we went to see his house at Cragside (Unfortunately no photo's as it was so wet, & no photo's from inside either, as it is a NT property) It was beautiful, and there were delightful examples of William Morris wall papers and Victorian/Edwardian decoration.

However we did go & see his other property - Bamburgh Castle which he purchased in the 1890's and extensively renovated.

Having read this I an tempted to put a picture up of Lord Armstrong in the Laundry Room - Just to remind me that modern day housework is not the drudge it could have been, due this mans inventiveness.....

And of course - a castle would be amiss without a cannon to fire!

Or a stunning view to admire (see, a photo with the sun shining!)

Our final big trip was to the Holy Islands to see Lindisfarne Abbey. Arriving later in the day, there was no time to go to both Castle and Abbey....

We strolled along the harbour side, admiring recycling at its best, before taking a coastal walk to the Abbey, avoiding most of the hustle & bustle of fellow sight seer's....

It was quite simply beautiful in all its destruction.

Then we drove back, across the flats before the tide came in....

On our last day we stopped of a Craster - A tiny fishing village. Cottages on the edge of the harbour facing out to sea....

Separated by the road, were their little front gardens, backing straight onto the edge of the harbour....

A wander round the village found a lovely house (I'm coveting again!)

Whilst the smokey wood smell from the fish curing building was more pleasant than I would have expected....

We also found a lovely Gallery - the work by Mick Oulsen was fantastic, but sadly out of my price range.

To end our holiday we decide to make the walk up to Dunstabrugh Castle. It was apparently only 1 1/4 miles - but with strong winds, and a little lady who has only little legs, it felt longer....

We stopped of to eat our lunch on the beach and examine more rock pools...

Before finally making it up there.

Now I am home.

Castled & rockpooled out.

Its back to realtiy as I tackle the packing away & laundry.

No more empty beaches & stunning skies.

But I have a selection of heart shaped stones, found by the Little People & proudly given to me, and I have to admit, I've fallen in love with Northumberland.

Love Lydia xx

Cornwall - Lizzard Point

2009-08-10T20:55:00.005+01:00

I am struggling to believe its only just over a week since we came back from Cornwall - the time has flown, and it's back to the almost usual routines of daily life.

Blogging has however given me a good excuse to sneek a peek back at some of the photo's we took whilst away.

One of the unexpected highlights of our stay was a visit to the lighthouse at Lizard Point - the most southerly point in England. It was a wet day, not suitable for the beach, and the small people had tooo much energy to reign in for shopping, so we decided to pay a visit to this lovely looking lighthouse....

Which was busy at work due to the misty wet weather, including the foghorn that felt like it went through me each time it sounded - never again will I tell the children they have voices like foghorns.

In the working museum the Small People were able to send signals, and track ships....

and watch a film about the lighthouse and it predecessors (I thought it was a long way to come to watch an episode of coast - although the 8 year old did not agree...)

Ooodles of fun was had learning how to signal with flags -

And G & the 8 year old went up to see the lamp room of the lighthouse....

After all the energy used up exploring and learning, we wandered down to the nearby tearooms, and had the most deliciously simple lunch - beans on toast for the 8 year old - & huge granary doorstop sandwiches for the rest of us. Yum!

Post lunch, and with the weather looking a smidge brighter we took a steady walk down to the old lifeboat house - one of the earliest sites for life boat launches. It's now redundant in all its run down splendour. Apparently a renowned artist used to paint from it - although I forgot whom, by the time I'd walked back up the hill....

We walking past the most southerly house in England....

Down to the little bay, for a closer inspection of the bay and boats....

And even whilst it was still overcast, the view was, I think, really quite beautiful.

Love Lydia xx

7 Days - 1400 miles - 1 Wedding and 1 Holiday

2009-08-03T21:12:00.006+01:00

Saturday 25th & my not-so-little middle brother got married in Northumberland. The day we should have been driving down to Cornwall.

So long as he promised not to do this on a regular occasion, we happily delayed the start of our holiday and went up instead of down the country. His bride looked beautiful, and the sun shone down all afternoon - the Groom scrubbed up well too...

I was so proud of the Little People as they took their respective bridesmaid / pageboy duties most seriously, and were beautifully well behaved..

We drove down to Cornwall on the Sunday, arriving completely cream-crackered, from all the exciting events over the past 48 hours.

We were lucky enough to have some sun....

And even the overcast wet days were more tolerable than if we'd been at home -

The wet suits proved invaluable again - On the cooler days they kept them deliciously warm and snug, and on the hotter one, protecting them from the sun.

Whilst the 8 year old's latest obsession with the icy cold waves left me in a slightly nervous state, jumping around like a water nymph. He doesn't carry an ounce of fat on him & I feared he would be washed away, or catch his death of cold.

Hope everyone is enjoying the start of the summer holidays

Love from Lydia x

Peas perfect Peas

2009-07-23T21:35:00.004+01:00

Apologies for being a lazy blogger - the days seem to have flown by. However inspired by the first batch of home grown pea's I decided to get my backside off the sofa, and put fingers too the keyboard.....

Ta-da....
Evidence of the child slave labour employed in my house....

Although I think Little Miss ate more than she admitted to. Fresh peas from the pod bring back strong childhood memories of my Grandpa's garden, continued on by my Uncle's vegetable patch. I hope in turn, it becomes a special memory for my two little people.

As do Sweet Pea's always grown by my Grandma. For years I have tried to grow them, with gradual improving success - this year has been the best yet....

I am beginning to find my feet in the new job, it's been a huge learning curve (more mountain, I think). I have started to take on my own case load under supervision, and I don't think I realised just how emotionally tiring it can be (& I think I may have been doing a tad too much sofa spliging in the evening). Yet I continue to be amazed at peoples kindness, warmth and often humour as I visit them at home. On hot days people have been kind enough to offer ice cold lemonade, and many a sensitive conversation has been held over a cup of tea. Everybody has a story to tell, and its fascinating (& sometimes sad) to hear them....

One of the nice things about the job at this time of the year, is driving around the many areas of green country side surrounding the patch I cover. I never realised just how green it is where I live & the rolling hills that surround the area

Here's a sneaky peak of one of my often travelled roads....

And this is the road I drive down to the Hospice each morning - Patrick Gale wrote in his book 'Notes from an exhibition' about a lane where the tree's arch over, creating a green cathedral in the light, and this is the thought I hold in my mind, as I go to & from work each day. It gives a sense of peace and calm at the start & end of my working day.

& finally (in my best Trevor MacDonald voice) continuing on the Green theme - Perfectly Happy Mum tagged me to make a green promise - I missed the proper week.

However it did make me think. I am an avid recycler of plastics as well as paper/tin/compost, redistribute clothes & knick knacks, and rarely fill my fortnightly black bin - I did notice that I am a bit of a lazy madam with the wash powder liquid & fabric conditioner, preferring to judge the quantity - far quicker... Yet it's quite amazing; when you do use the measure, the bottle really does last 24/42 washes. Better for the environment & my purse - thank you Peggy!

Love Lydia xx

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-24T19:57:00.005+01:00

Love Lydia xx