Facing The Fear

So this weekend I drove to Northumberland on my own with the small people.

:: I drove. On my own. To Northumberland::

This is mahoosive. This was Girl Power. This was me Facing the Fear.

Anybody who knows me would tell you I am happy to pootle around country lanes, villages & our small town. I can drive on the M1 - 2 junctions, 3 roundabouts to IKEA - 3 junctions & 2 roundabouts to my bestest friends house. Ask me to drive to Sheffield, Derby or any where else & I go into meltdown. Total meltdown, even with the aid of a sat nav, I am a bag of nerves. 

:: The sort of nerves that see me drive down a tramline route. The wrong way. In Sheffield ::

So I must have been overtired, deluded or hormonal when I decided to drive to a family christening 

:: On my own. To Northumberland::

Saturday

The 11 year old reassures me that he will help me follow the route. Quite how Pokemon Battles helped, other than to keep him quiet I do not know - although there is something utterly heartwarming watching

him hug his beloved Eye-ore all the way there & back. (On reflection, it have been silent, fear induced Eye-ore holding ) He's on the threshold of teenage hormones & angst, but still young in so many ways.

In the back the 8 year old was also suitably entertained.

Just over 3 hours later we arrived. One stop at Wetherby. In one piece. No arguments or shouty mummy moments. One call to G to say I couldn't find the Holiday Inn (someone put trees in front on purpose to make it hard for me)

I then managed to get to my brothers house (4 roundabouts, 2 right, 2 left turns) for a pre-christening bonding session. Before returning to the hotel (actually I went back to his house by accident first, someone moved the roads round when I wasn't looking).

Smalls occupied. Me occupied. All in control.

Sunday.

After an interesting nights sleep (the 8 year old talks in her sleep, & pinches - rather too well as I found out). We awoke & got ready for breakfast. 40 minutes later, one Ribeana spill down the only clean blouse a certain 8 year old had, face soap, trouser press, hairdryer & borrowed iron we finally made it. 

My brother is lucky enough to live a very short drive away from the sea. 10 whole minutes away. You may feel my jealousy as I type this (in a sisterly way). 

Oh I have beach envy. Serious beach envy. The call of the sea is something I cannot resist.Especially when he is already there with his eldest little one.

Now she just rocks - as only a 2 year old can. Utterly beautiful. Enchanting with her chatter. Totally adored by the 11 year old. I even said to my brother that I couldn't believe he could make such a beautiful child (in a sisterly way)

And this hour, with the children, on the beach, in the fresh air, paddling in the water, gathering, digging, playing. 

It made Facing the Fear worthwhile. 

Precious moments, made all the greater, knowing that 

:: I drove. On my own. To Northumberland::

If I did it once, I can do it again. That my little ones may be able to grow up seeing more of their cousins than I thought they would. If I can manage this drive, and two children, an overnight stay on my own, where else could I go? that thought is empowering.

My beautiful girl gathered me jet black pebbles from the beach. They will go in a jar. To remind me

:: I drove. On my own. To Northumberland::

I swear, I'm almost. Fearless. Well a little bit less than I was.... 

Lx

(& the Christening was just Perfect)

This Time Last Month....

Christmas Day 2011 - Polzeath Beach Cornwall - Us & Brightside

Lx

Sugar & Spice - All things nice.....

There's been a whole lot of baking & mess creating here at Twelve over the past 2 weeks.

From a Smurf Toadstool for my best friend's 5 year old....

To a mahoosive 72 cupcakes.

A 'Worlds Biggest Coffee Morning' for a very good charity was being held where G has his office, & my boss also retired last week (nothing to do with me!)...

::Lemon Meringue::

::Raspberry Pavlova::

::Lime::

::Chocolate Orange::

Yum! & surely there's 1of your 5 a day in each those fruit themed cupcakes....

I still find baking very enjoyable, even if the pleasure is not in the eating anymore.... And for my efforts, G brought home an apron he won at the coffee morning - Thanks babe! 

The 10 year old also had his school trip to Kelham Island in Sheffield last week. There were requests for 1940's style clothing and strict instructions on a WW2 pack up for lunch. Thank goodness for Grandads gardening flat cap & Uncle T's wooly socks....

Now my boy is growing, he has hollow legs when it comes to food. So I kinda knew that even with a thick white bread & jam sandwich, and the biggest English apple I could find, it would not keep him going till tea time. So after an internet search on baking WW2 recipes, we decided to have a go at grated carrot (& my finger) biscuits. They were surprisingly passable, and even his friend's ate them - or they may have just been hungry too....

So lunch was all tied up in paper & string, and packed into a paper bag.

Ahhhh, look at him racing into the car - eager to go on his trip... No way had he just told me to 'give over mum with the camera'.  No, he never would, not after all the effort I'd put in...

Hmpff!

Lx

:: It was good in Cornwall :: Part One

:: To discover new beaches - Godrevy on the West Coast, a National Trust beach ::

:: Parking on the cliff, with the shortest of walks down to wide open coves of golden sand & crystal clear blue waters for as far as the eye could see ::

:: It was good to see the smiles on my 10 year old as he scampered like a mountain goat on the rocks ::
:: Water, sand, rocks. All he needs ::

:: It was so good, that we went back again ::

:: This time we called in at Hell's Mouth Cafe for lunch, which was delicious, and very well priced ::

:: Following the advice of a lovely gentleman, who informed my small people that they would be able to see seals further up the beach (true indeed, much excitment too) we wandered up to Hell's Mouth Cove:: 

::Sadly for such a beautiful place, he also told me it is also known as a suicide spot - it was so very moving to look at the local church number, offering support in times of need, pinned on the fence ::

:: It was good to visit Port Issac. To wander down the steep streets of fishing cottages ::

:: To the working Harbour ::

:: Small one collected sea glass & pottery treasures ::

:: And I had a serious case of the wanties in this emporium of wonderful things ::

:: As the sun came out, we walked the path back to the car park, overlooking the sea & it was good ::

:: It was good to revisit Polzeath Beach::
:: Our family works well on the beach, we've developed a rythm that suits all :: I have my tent, to shelter me from the sun & in which I sit & read, watch, cuddle & nourish from ::

:: Small one builds sand castles ::

:: And here we stay - late into the evening. Tucking into hot Cornish Pasties as the tide makes it way in ::

:: Squeezing every drop out of a beautiful chilled day.

 :: And as the darkness takes hold, late at night, I strip off small people, dry them off & wrap them up warm - I do think G is big enough to sort himself out, so don't offer ::

:: Hot camper drinks ::

 :: Its also good to slow down and watch & listen to the smalls people, eaves drop on their conversation, take in their growing personalities - ponder on what their future holds, whilst sometimes still wishing I could have them little again ::

:: I asked G ? When did the 10 year stop shouting out the make of the tractor that passed us on the roads? Something that was so much a part of his early years, has stopped & I hadn't realised till now. Then I notice a 7 & 10 year old reading the cartoon strips in the Daily Mail - and laughing, as only children can, at the silliness of adult humour ::

:: Yes, its all been good ::

Lx

Can I also add a big thankyou for all your lovely messages on my last post - & also say 'Hello" to Jayne, thankyou so much for your comment!